Life is one large series of events, would you agree? Largely how it effects you is in the way that you react to the events. It's what separates us from each other and makes us different and can sometimes break us into pieces. Once I understood this I could better deal with life's problems.
For instance, if friend "A" had to deal with a divorce and friend "B" had to deal with a divorce, friend "A" could become totally unglued and make a mess of his/her life while friend "B" could acknowledge the pain, grow from it and move on.
A series of bad reactions to events and you may end up with a total mess of your life wondering why. Did you react in the best possible way to life's events? Or did you turn to substance abuse, drinking, or worse?
I can't explain this as well as I'd like to but it's one of the things that have helped me grow and something I have talked to my kids about and hope that they can learn from it.
Acknowledge your pain and know that your reaction isn't just the footnotes on your book of life. Your reactions are actually the book.